[By Jason Mills]
There are many articles in female magazines that call for girls to become someone other than themselves in order to put a smile on their partners’ face. The truth is that with us blokes, sometimes it takes even less than what you think to make us happy. We are not superficial, cold-hearted aliens from Mars and a small gesture can go a long way even if we may not always show it at the time.
If you girls out there want to know what will truly put a smile on a man’s face, read on for a guy’s perspective on what really counts in a relationship.
1. Always ask questions
We guys want to feel like you care about our day too! How was your day? What can I get for you?, What was the score from your game? A lot of men like to hear themselves talk, and nothing is better than having an appreciative audience.
2. Spice it up
Nothing is more boring than predictability and routine. Unless your bloke is a rock star, chances are he will hold a nine-to-five job like the rest of us. As soon as we knock off work, it is nice to have a little break in our daily routine once in a while. So instead of slumping in front of the TV to watch The Simpsons, it is nice to get a surprise. It can be a home- cooked meal by candlelight or drinks by the river, whatever you plan, it is nice to have a little break from the norm with you taking the initiative for once. Being spontaneous and fun will always make your man smile and be happy.
3. Let loose
I know it sounds silly but do you remember when you were a teenager? Having drinks with your boyfriend/ girlfriend and getting fun and crazy. As we get older, sometimes we forget how to let loose and have fun, we become bound by schedules, deadlines, our fear of wrinkles and eyebags etc, and we lose that spontaneous streak where we just let our hair down and have fun. Having a drink with your partner can help you relax and reconnect with the old times. One rule: Keep all mobile devices away during your time together, there is nothing more irritating than having your partner constantly checking his handphone while you are trying to unwind as a couple.
4. Play the damn video game with us
Don’t sulk when we turn on the computer and throw ourselves into our video games. Would you rather have us out with our mates downing pints till dawn? Video games are our way of relaxing and having fun; it is akin to you and your manicures or window shopping trips. You may never understand but don’t bitch at us when we are engaging in a little “me” time. Once in a while, try playing the video game with us! Even if you are not hooked, we would appreciate the effort. If you are rolling your eyes right now, imagine what it’s like when we go shopping with you and cut us some slack. So just give it a try and come into our world, in return we promise we will try our best to do the things you love (like shopping) too!
5. Touch is very important, don’t be clingy but massages are a must.
We like little touches, from a cuddle to a brush of the fingertips. It makes us feel loved and wanted. As men, we are not experts at reading body language so little touches let us know that you love us and all is okay between us.
6. Have your own opinion
Some women lose their identity when they get into a relationship. I think that’s sad because most men value a partner who is confident and has a mind of her own. Debating a point with your man can spice up the relationship and it is sexy to know that your girl has a brain. Nothing is more off putting than a girl who loses her identity the moment she gets into a relationship. No man wants to date a version of himself, so stay yourself and share your opinions with us. We may not always agree with you but it is always nice to hear your opinions on the world.
7. Let us hang with the boys.
Before you women came along, we men had special bonds with our mates. This bond may go way back to our boarding school days or beyond. So when you enter a man’s life, don’t try to replace his friends. Instead be friends with his friends and don’t be jealous when he wants to hang out with his mates. You fell in love with him because he was unique and had a great life. You are part of it now but do not take away his original life. If you want him to stay happy you will encourage his freedom. And if he is a keeper, then he will respect you for that and not abuse your trust.
This seems to be a recent phenomen. One of the biggest problems girls have nowadays is that many are on some weird diet at one time or other, be it vegan, Atkins, South Beach etc. All this dietary restrictions make meal times a real hassle. There is nothing sexier than a woman who enjoys food and actually eats at meal times! Sure, we want a lady with a sexy figure but that’s where exercise should come in, starving yourself skinny just isn’t sexy or cool, at least from a man’s point of view. In fact, it is disturbing to see you sucking on a celery stick while we are tucking voraciously into our ribs.
9. Buy gifts.
Gift buying should not be reserved for men. Most men I know would love to receive a gift from a girl. It shows thought and care that you have bothered to pick something out for us. We men are little boys inside and we like to be surprised and appreciated at times.
10. Be Happy.
No man wants a miserable boring girl. Smiling is contagious, positive attitude is needed to make your man content. Love him and show him you love him. Effort goes a long way, and it may seem like a lot of work but if you do these things then in return he will give effort and make you happy.
I hope I was able to shed some light on what is important to a guy from a guy’s point of view. Sometimes we forget how important it is to put effort in relationships. So let’s turn that frown upside down and let’s dance.